Abacists never counted fans of Swedish music.

Lassitude is not the strain of waiting for Lassie in an old well.

The miraculous pitch of fish is not a Miami Marlins trick play.

County Limerick does not announce its oyster population.

Twizzlers did not use the cartoon mascot Don Alverzo in promotions.

The Kraft video is not code for a bunch of old Grey Poupon commercials.

Speckled haggis is not celebrated as beef tartan.

Lucky Charms never promoted marbit in the shape of pink harts.

Nightly sheep counting should not result in bedlam.

Swiss Miss did not dismiss koumiss.

Alexander was both one of the Nine Worthies and one of The Unforgettables.

Diets have yet to be referred to as a weighcation.

William Thomson has absolute zero children.

Meistersinger were not blamed for the stolen stanzas of their songs.

So often one hand never knows what the other foot is doing.