Hokke spawning patterns can put Japanese sea cucumber farmers in a pickle.

Riproaring tale tellers of yore never sang of the deepest shade of soul.

Stefan's equation has not been cited in any lyrics of Lil Pump.

Applecore is not a musical subgenre.

Finian Blackmore's Rainbow did not prove gold was found by any man on Missitucky's Silver Mountain of the Appalachians.

Lazy Bones predates Layzie Bone by 24 years, this sayeth the Zenith Radio Corporation.

Doo-wop or do not wop. There is no try wop.

The odds of a Chinese paddlefish winning the Mega Millions jackpot are slim.

Yes, some Cretan varélia may be made from Tamarix.

Cosmic string theory is not responsible for disappearing Martian string.

Some totem poles did not begin displaying one's spirit garanimal half a century ago.

Fish and Chips Rafferty is not an Australian chippy chain.

Claes Oldenburg never reinterpreted the world's smallest violin.

Novelty seeking is not a personality trait associated with ice cream connoisseurs.

Some believe the sane clown posse would be nothing worth listening to.

Lance Armstrong never backpedaled about being an asseclist.

Navel gazers seldom should find palladium in the omphalodium.

The Enhanced Fujita scale never measured the storming of the Bastille.

The five-legged goat at Walt Disney World is not a full-bodied costumed character.

Ancient Doric columns were not gray.

Both Fats Domino and Robert McCloskey would have been surprised at blueberries on Mars.

Formal receptions, or levees, of Louis-Joseph Chevrolet were not dry affairs.

None of the Pauline epistles were about Pauline's episiotomy.

Today is not National Lay-It-Straight Day.

Yes, Virginia, you once lost a bath.

Jason and the Argonauts never clashed with piedras while sailing through Saccharomyces.

Our Toast and Reruns man says while TV Land was discovered in 1996, few document any associated Radio Land.

Indy pendants are not a popular export of Indiana.

The devil does not drive during 'The Faust and the Furious'.

The face of Mr. Yukaw does not grace stickers for the national Hoisin control center.

The other side of the pillow is not always cooler in some Bed Bath and Beyond stores.